myfirstdedication

there i was in the most serene of places

i was surrounded by nothing but nature and the beautiful side of people

and for a change, i could breathe.

to the boy who called himself a man...

thank you for showing meeh the difference

because of you, i know how to take care of myself

for so long i hated you for beating not just meeh, but my soul

but truth be told, you made meeh stronger

to the daffodil who flails in the wind

it is not your fault

and i apologize to you for making you feel like it was all those years

it was hard for you but i didnt want to see past the pain it caused meeh

because of you my vision is sharper and my judgment, not so much

to the conniving wizard of the roundtable

you played meeh well, and i thank you

you showed meeh my limits and how worthless spoken words really are

and how wonderful a first love could be

though i must admit, at times i wish it was more than that

to the chimeric mistress

at times i am so confused

you have instilled in meeh a fear so great

but i am grateful, as i know now to pray hard

to you, my monster in the closet

no one has had a greater impact on my life than you

though i think ill never be able to include you in another step of it

whether you know it or not, you influence every decision i make

for the bad or good of it

and as much as i would like to never think on your existence

i do - at every chance i get

you are the biggest part of meeh

thank you for forcing meeh to become a woman

perhaps i would have liked more time

but i would do nothing differently

i love the woman i have become

to my id

you drive meeh crazy

i feel so back and forth with you

the very thing that drew meeh so close pushes meeh so far

you are nothing i need but occassionally all that i want

you help meeh to understand my self destructive side

and i could not be more grateful

without that understanding im sure id never be happy

to my dream catcher

i lay beside you night after night

and the things i thought i knew i dont

but thats fine

at times i am overwhelmed by this decision

but i get lost in your eyes

and its all worth it again

there are many more but the words allude meeh

for you, however, you will be my first dedication